Friday, March 28, 2008

unmistakable voice

i've always struggled with knowing whether the voice i thought i was hearing was that of God or just my mind working overtime. the past few days, i have heard HIM. i feel Him speaking to me. i will think a question and He will answer me.

i'm still working on my relationship with Him...mainly just trying to keep myself committed. but the past few days, i have felt so close to my Jesus.

and yes, sometimes the things He's telling me are not pleasant.

for instance, "am I not the same on wednesday as I am on sunday? worship ME regardless of the day or song!"

or, "you keep asking for boldness and opportunity. I'm giving it to you. use it!"

jerry and i have been struggling with issues of money lately...not really "lack of"...i mean, we're fine. it just seems like every time we get ahead and have a little extra, something comes up. we just want to be able to enjoy our children something, not pay another stinkin' medical bill!

yesterday, we got an unexpected check in the mail. it was for an over-estimation on our taxes for our house. i began praying about what to do with it. should we hold it because something is going to come up? what should we do?

His answer, "you have been faithful to Me. I am faithful to you."

this morning, i was reading in my bible about the life of Jesus and His disciples. in my morning readings, i just started at the new testament and have been reading in order for a few weeks. this morning, i asked for a specific verse.

he gave me Genesis 4:3. "And in the process of time it came to pass that Cain brought an offering of the fruit of the ground to the Lord."

at first i was thinking, okay, this was just my own head telling me this verse. it was not from God. but then i began to think about it. cain brought an offering to the Lord...part of his crop...something he had grown.

i began to pray and ask God what i had to give to him? what could i bring to the table? this train of thought brought on a prayer about me and my talents. how can i be used for His kingdom? what can i do? what should i be doing? is teaching where i need to be? is it my calling?

when i got to school this morning, i had this in my e-mail:

Daily Devotional by Max Lucado
“the One who came still comes and the One who spoke still speaks”

March 28
Uniquely You

He gave…to each according to his ability.
Matthew 25:15 (NKJV)

Da Vinci painted one Mona Lisa. Beethoven composed one Fifth Symphony. And God made one version of you. He custom designed you for a one-of-a-kind assignment. Mine like a gold digger the unique-to-you nuggets from your life….

When God gives an assignment, he also gives the skill. Study your skills, then, to reveal your assignment.

Look at you. Your uncanny ease with numbers. Your quenchless curiosity about chemistry. Others stare at blueprints and yawn; you read them and drool. “I was made to do this,” you say.

Our Maker gives assignments to people, “to each according to each one’s unique ability.” As he calls, he equips. Look back over your life. What have you consistently done well? What have you loved to do? Stand at the intersection of your affections and successes and find your uniqueness.

From: Cure for the Common Life
Copyright (W Publishing Group, 2005) Max Lucado

this was not an audible answer, but does it have to be?? hello! when God gives an assignment, He also gives the skill?!?!

my new quest: what is my skill??


ree said...

The part that stuck out to me was, "look at you. your uncanny ease with numbers".

That's so awesome, crys! I'm so glad for you and this deep calling to deep experience you've been having!

seph said...

what an insightful and inspirational post. i feel like you have been more...alive...the last few times i've talked to you. not that you weren't before, but you know how walking close to Jesus makes us. vibrant and excited for each moment. it shows, my friend! i'm praying that the place where your loves and your skills intersect is revealed plainly to you sooner rather than later. it is so exciting to be dwelling in a place where Jesus is working on us, isn't it? even if it is an unknown for now, we can always be sure He has our best interest in mind, and that is a wonderful truth to ponder. good plans... good plans...

Chris said...

This is so true because God can speak to us in so many different ways, even those that are unexpected. You are unique and have a special calling on your life and I pray God will show you all the skills, gifts He has given to you.

marme said...

that is incredible!

I continue to stand amazed when God speaks, specifically and individually to one of His children.


Now I'm anxiously awaiting what your new season will hold...